Tuesday, February 7

Happy Birthday


Phil Soltanek born February 7, 1956

"I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" "Well... are you religious?" He said yes. I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant ? "Protestant." "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist" "Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?" "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off. "

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:03 AM EST

    I like to pretend that the emocore musical movement plays his brilliant comic riffs over a pulsing techno beat, rather than being a bunch of no-soul grad school whiners.

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  2. Anonymous11:36 AM EST

    Listening to Emo is like hearing the sound the ding an sich makes when it snogs a patootie.

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  3. Emo's still around, although he got a better haircut. He's in "The Aristocrats," frex.

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  4. So you guys are like, speaking in code, right?

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  5. Anonymous1:09 AM EST

    Houston, we have a problem? What do you mean by code?

    ReplyDelete