Friday, January 9
Bush Farewell Tour, Supplemental: Fine. Now Can We Unveil The New First Lady?
Laura Bush unveils George W. Bush state china
By LISA TOLIN
WASHINGTON (AP) — First lady Laura Bush showed off a new gold-rimmed set of official George W. Bush state china on Wednesday, with less than two weeks to use it before the family packs up for Texas.
OKAY, so we waited seven years, eleven months, and eight days, but the Bush Administration finally makes a smart move, namely, waiting until they were almost out of town before unveiling their new finery.
Laura Bush said the china has been in the works for several years and the family had hoped to be able to use it, but the process took longer than expected.
Sure it did.
Look, no problem on general principles here; it is the People's House, and thus must be decorated and furnished for the second coming of The Sun King. The objection to Nancy Reagan and her Marie Antoinette instincts wasn't custodial, but, well, one, just that Nancy Reagan was so fucking objectionable; two, that the whole thing was part of an orchestrated Style Offensive for the return of the Imperial Presidency and the Great Stratified Society program; and, finally, that the woman had no fucking taste whatsoever, or none that could not be subsumed as "Tinseltown Regency Revival".
Laura Bush said she commissioned the dinnerware because of breakage and a need for more settings for larger events, and added a second Magnolia-patterned set for $74,000 for use at private family dinners and smaller events.
She said she was aware of criticism her predecessors received for buying expensive china, but said it was paid for with private money and that when the process started, "the economy was a lot better than it is today."
No, the problem is getting the "paid for by private donations" routine. Of course it was paid for by private donations, you twit; even if we had wanted to give you your own 320-piece porcelain Medal of Freedom, which we didn't, we couldn't have, because your husband spent the entire public treasury he inherited, plus everything that can be collected for the next twenty-five years assuming all goes well, in some perpetual-adolescent--albeit, in the main, successful--attempt to prove he could be a worse choice than his Daddy, even. For that matter, private fucking donations got us his Presidency in the first place, and we didn't really need that, either.
And why did we need enough of your china to completely cover the largest White House events? Mix and match has been the order of the day since Benjamin Harrison, and there's been a China Room since Wilson. It's history, not the fuggin' Wealth Network. Oh, and thanks for choosing magnolias. I don't think faux-Southern gentility gets nearly enough play. (What? Oh, there are magnolias on the White House lawn? Well, never mind, then; I guess we should just be thankful you didn't go with the gopher motif.)
Just leave, okay? Nobody's demanding that you slink. Nobody's even bothering to ask how the economy got so fucking bad in the interim between grandiose privately-funded scheme and delivery. Just go, bearing in mind the backhanding your husband gave the previous administration when they left, and hold your tongue when Michelle Obama announces she's turning Dick Nixon's bowling alley into a combination Frisbee golf and skeet-shooting bunker for the girls.