Okay, last week set a standard that may never be met. This week's issue has a distinct check-the-wastebaskets-we-need-42-more-column-inches feel:
Letters: V. Aleman, glad Rob Morrow is back on teevee. Jim Peffley reminding us that Blind Justice has some big shoes to fill: James Franciscus' eponymous blind detective in Longstreet. Kathy Grillo revealing that Luke and Lorelai's reconcilliation on Gilmore Girls was the most romantic thing she'd seen "since Rhett carried Scarlett up that staircase". Bill Hicks, who is unquestionably not that Bill Hicks but does know comedy when he sees it, averring that Saturday Night Live is a shell of its former self.
Poll: Is 24 Too Violent This Season? Yes 8% No 92%.
Here's the odd thing about that. They provide you with the rationale for your vote (Yes: It seems like every week someone is getting Tasered or tortured; No: The show has always pushed the envelope). I don't know about you, but I've had it with The Man tellin' me what to think.
American Idol Watch: Oh, Babies! Match the baby picture with today's American Idol finalists.
I was still steaming about the poll thing, so I deliberately got them wrong.
Reason To Go On Living: Fran Drescher returns to teevee in Living With Fran, in which she plays a divorced mom shacking up with a hunk who's not much older than her bitterly neurotic, failed med-student son.
Top Ten-to-Hundred of the Week: The 10 Greatest Sports Rivalries.
#1 Bosox vs. Yankees.
For cryin' out loud. If I wanted three pages of time-wasting conventional wisdom which even its author can't seem to work up an interest in I'd be reading...nevermind.
Thing I Did Not Know: There's still an E! network.