Tuesday, June 7

Hey Tony! How 'Bout Resigning From The House So You Can Spend More Time In Junior High?

Jack Shafer, "Anthony Weiner's Semantic Satiation". June 6

FIRST, The Odd Confluence of Military History and Poor Marksmanship, As Performed By the Inmates of Slate Under the Direction of Jack Shafer: Officialdom has been deflecting criticism of itself by accepting full responsibility at least since the time God owned up that Mistakes Were Made in the Garden of Eden, and went ahead and punished Eve anyway. This was not something Mickey Kaus discovered in the wake of Waco. Mickey Kaus has never discovered anything, except how to make an inexplicable living. You would think that absolving yourself by blaming yourself would seem the most natural thing in the world to someone who writes for Slate.
I'm less judgmental about the "sin" that Weiner confessed to this afternoon, of sexting his junk or his chest shots to six women over three years. If you're as old as Weiner (46) and have never done something naughty but still legal, you're probably immune to the power of human desire, have no sense of fantasy, and have been living in a locked veal cage in a convent basement. You don't have to be a libertine to not care about a politician's kinks, as long as those kinks don't get in the way of his job.

Hey, I'd be the last guy to tell you that utter weirdness can't cold-cock (sorry) a man in his Forties, but look: if we're gonna criticize Weiner's pro-forma behavior, both the denials and the Oh Shit I'm Stuck apology, then let's throw in this reaction for good measure. No, it is not fucking understandable. The moment Representative Anthony Weiner could not say "with certitude" whether a cellphone snapshot of someone's underwear was his or not we were done.

Look: it's beyond time to acknowledge that we in the West couldn't deal with the 19th century, let alone face the 20th, and that over the past thirty years or so we've descended into a bunch of children playing in a mud puddle. We already know about human sexuality, Jack. We have at least since Krafft-Ebing. What David Vitter does in private is between him, his hookers, and his pediatrician. We know that. If David Vitter, or Larry Craig, finds a little sexual joy in this lifetime they're probably in the top 50th percentile, and more power to 'em. They're hypocrites, of course, and worthy of our opprobrium for that, and lots else. But we're got the "human sexuality is weirder than Oprah might allow" bit.

But it is about the act here, or at least the context: Sexting? Really? Twitter sex? At 46? I begrudge no man his Kink, but that doesn't mean I renounce all right to consider it. Sending snapshots of your coyly-concealed junk to anonymous accounts isn't sex. It's digital obscene phone calling, virtual heavy breathing. I'd'a defended him for being discovered with a harem of oiled-up cabaña boys; behaving like a fourteen-year-old girl is something else entirely. Pace Congressman Weiner, Congressman Weiner needs a long vacation. And not on the taxpayer's dime.

13 comments:

Fearguth said...

That's what I wanted to say, Doghouse, but you beat me to it.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

My reaction?

Let s(h)itting Senator Dave Vitter resign before the Democrats unilaterally disarm, yet again.
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millsapian87 said...

And now Breitbart, already an insufferable prick, will be even more so now. Thanks a lot, Congressman, you shit-for-brains.

StringonaStick said...

More Breitbart is an offense against, well, just about everything. Insufferable only begins to describe him, and yes, thanks a whole lot for that, Congressman.

R. Porrofatto said...

Sending snapshots of your coyly-concealed junk to anonymous accounts isn't sex. It's digital obscene phone calling, virtual heavy breathing. I'd'a defended him for being discovered with a harem of oiled-up cabaña boys; behaving like a fourteen-year-old girl is something else entirely.

Thank you. By quirk of the typical American Congressional district as gerrymandered by M.C. Escher, Weiner is my Congressman. He should go away now, not just for being a lecherous ass, but for being an incredibly stupid fucking idiot.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

R. Porrofatto said...

You're saying the same thing that Reince Preibus, chairman of the Republican National Committee, is saying.

Does this make you more or less certain about your call, R. Porrofatto?
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R. Porrofatto said...

Well ifthe, I don't care if he resigns or just doesn't seek reelection. I voted for the guy; I liked that he was a fighter and I liked what he fought for. I don't care who or what he fucks and I disagree with the RNC chair that Weiner should resign because "he lied and acted inappropriately." I think he's done because he's shown himself to be inexcusably juvenile emailing pictures of his junk to young women he didn't know, and unforgivably stupid to be doing it from his own Twitter account and handing a clown like Breitbart such easy fuel for his gas mill.

Spitzer's libido also got him into trouble but he really wasn't so stupid about it, and I thought he might have have ridden it out right up until it was clear that Wall St. had his nuts in pair of FBI Channelocks. Hendrik Hertzberg thinks Weiner will be able to stick it out and be around for a while, and that may be. But I'd prefer to vote for someone whose power hasn't been so compromised, and whose integrity won't be questioned for fucking ever. He's no Kennedy, but if he still manages to claw his way back my mind can be changed -- my convictions being as flimsy as a politician's scruples, so who knows.

KWillow said...

It will be tough for Weiner to stand up in the House and give his rip-snortin speeches without being laughed and jeered off the podium.

DocAmazing said...

Weiner will be able to stick it out

There really is no getting past this sort of thing, is there?

Not that I want to...

PR said...

His unqualified support for the Zionists is even more troubling than his juvenile antics.

Anonymous said...

Yes, he's caught between AIPAC and a hard place.

Anonymous said...

I was defending him until I found out he was indulging in this crap while his wife was pregnant. Uh, Congressman, did you know that women have the right to vote now?

I still don't want him to resign, but mainly because I'm a Democrat and I don't want my party taking direction from Andrew Breitbart.

On the other hand, a week of continually hearing/reading about his junk is entirely enough.

Anonymous said...

"they're probably in the top 50th percentile" ! More like the top 1% and they don't deserve both all the money and all of the sex !