What: "Our first black president?"
Subhead: "It's worth remembering the context of Toni Morrison's famous phrase about Bill Clinton so we can retire it, now that Barack Obama is a contender."
Can That Possibly Be The Actual Subhead?: Yes.
Why You Need To Read Further: You don't.
Why You Might Anyway: 1) You're 12 and you have a report due tomorrow. 2) You're a Crotchety Senior Citizen who likes to keep abreast of the latest developments in tone-deaf idiocy.
Précis: The one time Toni Morrison referred to Bill Clinton as our first Black president she wasn't referring to his skin color.
Conclusion: The one time Toni Morrison referred to Bill Clinton as our first Black president she wasn't referring to his skin color.
Number of Words In Between: 800.
Number of Those Words Which Is "Cute": Two.
Why Our Forefathers Were Willing To Sacrifice Their All For a Free Press: "Once we stop rehashing this term out of context, we can stop accepting as a given that African-Americans have already had their black president, and focus instead on this actual African-American candidate we have before us, Barack Obama."
Describe Obama's South Carolina Primary Victory in Three Words or Less: "historic and overwhelming".
In These Historic and Overwhelming Times, Is It Still Possible to Make a Major Contribution to the Language?: "An actual black man now stands before the nation, making the case for why he thinks he is the best choice for president. Regardless of what happens in the weeks and months to come, America is listening."
Odds That The Multiple Ironies of the Above Were Lost on the Author: 5 in 6.
We Shall Overcome Our Historic Reluctance To Vote: "Obama won a majority of whites under 30, along with the vast majority of African-Americans and most women."
Okay, But What's The Metacontext?: "Real and urgent issues affect black people all across the nation."
Chance That After This I'll Apologize For Having Called Camille Paglia The Worst Writer on the Internets: Still zero.